Sometimes we go through hard times. We all do.

The way we rise up from those times is through great decisions we make. The problem is that when hitting rock bottom – making the right decisions isn’t particularly easy, let alone something that comes naturally. The natural reaction is quite the opposite – making the worst decisions.

In our hardest moments, it’s inevitable and very likely that the decisions we make will actually go bad and make the situation even worse.

Why aren’t we able to think clearly and decide objectively what’s good for us in those moments?

It can be due to fear of the unknown, fear of failure, and even fear of success. When you’re afraid, confused, maybe even uneducated, inexperienced or unknowledgeable – the probability that you will make the right decisions is very low.

In this article, I am going to help you to make sure that the decision you make in your hardest moments won’t inflict harm on you but will serve you in good stead. For that process of decision making to work well, you will need to be as honest, strong-minded and objective as you can.

I firmly believe that we all have free will, at least to some degree, and that it’s within our underrated capacity to change our lives for the better.

It all starts in the mind. The thoughts we think become the actions we take which become our habits which in turn become us.

By reflecting and mastering the art of self-talk, one can achieve almost everything.

“Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.”

-Napoleon Hill

By asking the right questions we can navigate our mind in the direction of success.

Whenever you’re at a crossroads and you have to make a decision you better go through this thinking process:

“How is this decision going to affect me in the future?”

Ask yourself. “Am I going to be satisfied or disappointed with this decision in the future?

If you’re probably going to be disappointed – don’t do it.

If you’re probably going to be satisfied with this decision – do it, but have a plan.

If you are not sure whether or not it will affect you in a positive way –

1. Collect more data, objectively. Read about the topic, do your research. Make sure you aren’t falling into the trap of confirmation bias where you pick only the evidence that suits your beliefs. Be as objective and facts-driven as you possibly can. The more correct and unbiased the data you collect the higher the chances that you’ll take a proper action that will lead to a desirable outcome.
2. Ask a professional/experienced person who already went through it. Make sure the advice is relevant to you, your situation and your time. Sometimes what’s good for one person might not be as good for another, and what’s good in one set of circumstances can’t be applied in the same way for another set of circumstances and it’s also changing across time – so make sure it’s relevant in all those dimensions.
3. Learn from your past experience. Take a look at your past and clarify the way in which your decision will affect you based on previous experiences. Maybe the implication of your decisions is too foggy and hard to relate to. In this case, you need to state out loud the most likely and reasonable outcome to this decision, which often can be done through objective observation of your past. “The past is the key to the future”.

 

Whenever you reach a fork in the road, and you have to choose between one path or another, never forget that:

1. You must choose
2. You can’t travel both roads
3. You’ll never know what could have happened if you had taken the other road
4. There’s no way back

As Robert Frost perfectly put it together in his amazing poem “The Road Not Taken”:

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

Both roads present themselves to you as equally valid but could lead to different outcomes.

It’s up to you which path to choose and since you can’t reverse the choice you better be happy with it.

 

Until next time,

-Gal